A suicide loss is a kind of grief the experts call “disenfranchised.” It’s the kind that we’re not supposed to talk about– the grief we’re supposed to shove under a rug because the topic is just too taboo. This unfortunate societal hitch makes a support group so powerful. Its the one place where we can let it all out and everyone there understands and welcomes your story– because your story makes them feel less alone too.
Solidarity is great. Especially when you’re experiencing a suicide loss. The entire world feels weird when you share the story you have about a person you love purposely leaving the earth. So, to find yourself in a circle with other people who all understand and who have a similar story to share feels so helpful.
But here’s the thing: most traditional support groups help us get that much-needed solidarity. But they don’t help us process the emotions we set down in that private space.
We tell our stories, which is a form of processing, but that’s often it.
I noticed that while that feels great, there was much more that we could do.
Suicide is a trauma. The American Psychiatry Association (APA) says that the effects of suicide on those left behind can feel as “catastrophic” as a concentration camp experience.
Trauma releases stress hormones into the body that can affect us negatively long-term. Using movement, breathing, and nervous system relaxation techniques, we can make sure this trauma runs through us instead of remains stuck inside of us, affecting our actions for years to come.
Suicide is also a form of abandonment, leaving us feeling lost, confused, and questioning. It’s often impossible to find closure after such a death.
Using techniques from the Grief Recovery Method, I can lead you through a process that helps you find as much closure as possible after a suicide.
Over the 9 weeks, we will breathe together, move our bodies, process through storytelling, writing, looking at our past, and finding closure.
Because I’ve found so much help myself using mediums, I also offer an optional extra session in which we invite a medium to help us find answers and even more closure.
It’s not everyone’s cup of tea, but I always appreciate the insights given and want others to be able to experience them if they choose.
Going to a support group isn’t easy. Nobody wants to ever sign into that first one. You might be asked to share something uncomfortable. You’ll have homework. You might need to go through old photos and really look at your relationship with the person you lost.
Sure, it might be uncomfortable, but it will be the most helpful thing you’ll do in terms of healing after a suicide loss.
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